Resolving Family Disputes: Mediation vs. Litigation Strategies
Are you in a family dispute and not sure which way to go?
Well, you’ve come to the right place.
All family disputes have the same goal: to get to a resolution that everyone can live with.
They just want to know which strategy will get them there:
- Peaceful solution that keeps relationships intact or
- Bitter court battle that tears families apart
But here’s the problem…
Most people assume litigation is the only way. And guess what? They’re wrong.
In fact, family disputes can play out very differently depending on the approach taken. The wrong path will make things worse, and lead to a conclusion no one wants.
Family disputes left unmanaged and without strategy have the power to permanently damage relationships.
The problem is that most people don’t have a clue about their options when a family conflict arises. Most haven’t even considered the alternatives, nor the impact their choice can have on family relationships and the future.
In this article, I’ll break down the main differences between mediation and litigation so you can pick the best path forward.
Contents
What you’ll discover
- Why Most Family Disputes Don’t Need Court
- Mediation: The Collaborative Approach
- When Litigation Makes Sense
- The Cost Comparison: What You Need To Know
- Success Rates That Might Surprise You
Why Most Family Disputes Don’t Need Court
Here’s one that’s going to shock you…
Only 5% of divorces in this country are actually decided by a judge in a courtroom. That means the remaining 95% of family disputes never see the inside of a courthouse.
Negotiation, mediation, settlement and all manner of alternatives get most family disputes through to a conclusion.
How come? Because most people don’t realize there are options until they’re embroiled in a dispute and it’s too late.
When families need legal guidance, seeking comprehensive family law support from experienced professionals can help determine whether mediation or litigation is the right approach for their specific situation.
Reality check…
Courts are busy, expensive and don’t enjoy making family decisions.
Judges would much rather see families who can still work together find a way to communicate and sort things out without them.
That’s why alternative dispute resolution exists.
Mediation: The Collaborative Approach
Mediation is a process in which a skilled third party helps two people, or more, have the difficult conversations they can’t have alone.
Think of it like a referee in a football game. Only, in this case, the ball is a family dispute and the players are two or more unwilling or unable to come to a resolution on their own.
Recent data shows that 93% of divorcing parents attempted to resolve their matters using some form of alternative dispute resolution (ADR) with the most used approach being mediation.
The Benefits of Family Mediation
Compared to litigation, there are a lot of benefits to family mediation:
- Faster — Cases conclude in weeks or months, rather than years
- Cheaper — About half the price of a litigated solution
- Privacy — Everything is confidential, not a matter of public record
- Control — You and your family call the shots, not a judge
- Relationships — Mediation can be the path of least destruction to keeping family relationships intact
Mediation is a powerful tool with a proven success rate:
Studies have shown a success rate of 78% across four major providers.
When Mediation Works Best
Mediation can be effective in situations where:
- Both parties have a willingness to communicate
- There are no issues of domestic violence or abuse
- There is an ongoing relationship that both parties want to preserve
- Both parties want to control the outcome
- The parties are willing to honestly disclose financial information
- Both parties are interested in reducing stress and the expense of court
Commitment to resolution is key to the success of family mediation.
When Litigation Makes Sense
Litigation is the formal legal process that uses a judge or jury to determine the final outcome of a dispute.
While court battles are typically very expensive, time-consuming and designed to leave everyone feeling bruised and battered, they have their uses.
Litigation and the court system is there for a reason. Where the power of the courts and the threat of a trial can protect the public and resolve matters that alternative dispute resolution can’t.
Situations That Require Court Intervention
Court is always an option if mediation can’t work or get your family to an agreement.
Court may be required where:
- Safety is a concern — Domestic violence, child abuse and threatening behavior mean mediation isn’t safe.
- Assets are being hidden — A family member is not disclosing all assets or income and mediation won’t work.
- Power imbalances are extreme — A spouse or family member dominates the relationship and mediation won’t work.
- Legal matters need a ruling — Complex legal issues that require a court ruling.
- Parties won’t comply with agreements — When a family member repeatedly disobeys agreements and court orders.
The Reality of Litigation
Litigation is adversarial, public and involves a judge or jury deciding who wins and who loses.
A few things most people don’t realize about litigation…
Litigation is very expensive, can take years to conclude and can completely destroy family relationships.
Divorce costs can average between $7,000 and $15,000, but more complex cases can be double or triple that.
Cost Comparison: What You Need To Know
The good news is you want to know where you can save money.
The bad news is…
Legal costs are always a huge concern to people who don’t have the money to throw at their family dispute.
The up-front and running costs of either mediation or litigation are concerning for most families.
Mediation Costs
Most mediators charge by the hour, which is then split between the parties. The average cost of mediation is $2,000 to $5,000 for the entire process.
Litigation Costs
Costs for court cases are usually much higher.
Court fees, lawyer’s fees, expert witnesses, private investigators and discovery are more than happy to drive litigation costs to $15,000 to $50,000 or more for each party.
Research has shown mediation can save families up to 50% in legal fees alone when compared to litigation.
The Hidden Costs to Consider
On top of the obvious up-front costs, families need to consider:
- Time off work for court and meetings
- Stress that costs health and productivity
- Damaged children who suffer as a result of the dispute
- Broken relationships that are lost forever
Success Rates That Might Surprise You
A lot of dispute resolution data may change your mind about what you want to do.
Success rates for mediation are very high, with an 85% settlement rate and most cases concluding within a few sessions.
Compare that to the experience of “winning” in litigation.
Even more impressive: Recent Florida data shows mediation success rates of 70-80% based on over 1,000 cases.
What Success Really Means
Success in family dispute resolution isn’t just about coming out on top. It’s about:
- Getting solutions that work for your family
- Preserving important relationships and reputations
- Moving on without ongoing conflict or bitterness
- Protecting children from unnecessary involvement
Mediation has proven effective at these outcomes and more.
Making the Right Choice for Your Family
Ok. Now comes the hard part. How do you know which path is best for your family?
Here are a few questions to ask yourself to help work it out:
- Are both parties willing to communicate?
- Are there issues of abuse or safety?
- How important is the relationship moving forward?
- Do you have complex legal matters to resolve?
- What is your family’s financial situation?
The reality is most family disputes can benefit from at least trying mediation first.
Family law is not about battles, winners and losers. Family law is about finding solutions that families can live with and move on from.
Conclusion: Finding Your Path Forward
Deciding between mediation and litigation can be difficult, but knowing your options is half the battle.
Here’s what you need to remember:
- Mediation works for most family disputes and is a lot less expensive.
- Litigation and the courts are an option when safety issues exist.
- Starting with mediation gives the family the best chance of preserving relationships.
- Professional advice can guide you to the right choice.
